You’re an idiot
There once was a skipper who was too lazy to scratch his own arse. One day there was no food on board. So he looked for a worm and started fishing. After a while he got a bite and hooked an incredibly fat eel. He said to his wife: 'Get it and fry it'. The wife grabbed the eel, but it bit her on her pinky finger. Then she let go and the eel fell back into the canal. The fisherman said: ‘You are an idiot, no wonder we are poor’. The woman said nothing, but thought of her little finger and cried. Moments later, the skipper got another bite and caught a huge tench. He threw it on the deck and said to his wife: ‘Take it and cook it.’ The wife tried to grab the tench, but it hit her on the thumb with its tail and jumped back into the canal. The man shouted: ‘I told you were an idiot, no wonder we are starving.’ The woman said nothing; she sat on the deck with her feet in the gangway and sucked her thumb. Soon after, the fisherman caught a big golden fish. He said to his wife, 'Take it and fry it.’ The wife grabbed the fish very carefully, but she liked it so much that she dared not clench her fingers tightly. So the fish broke free, jumped out and plunged into the water. The skipper threw his fishing rod on the deck in a rage and cried out: ’You are an idiot and you will always be an idiot.’ He went to bed and fell asleep. The woman was still crying with her feet in the gangway and her finger in her mouth. But soon she grabbed the rod herself and started fishing. It was not long before she had the same big, golden fish on the hook. She said to the fish: ‘You're an idiot too, just like me,’ and wanted to throw the fish back into the canal. But the fish spook: ‘Take a knife and scratch me.’ The woman started to cry even louder and said, sobbing loudly: ‘No, I can't.’ But the fish said again, this time more insistently: ‘Take a knife and scratch me’. So she took a knife and scraped the scales off. When she had scraped them off completely, she felt sorry for the fish again and threw it back into the canal. But as soon as the fish hit the water, it regained all its golden scales. And the scales the woman had scraped off turned into golden coins on the deck. Since then they have never been poor, and the man has never again called his wife an idiot.
You’re an idiot
There once was a skipper who was too lazy to scratch his own arse. One day there was no food on board. So he looked for a worm and started fishing. After a while he got a bite and hooked an incredibly fat eel. He said to his wife: 'Get it and fry it'. The wife grabbed the eel, but it bit her on her pinky finger. Then she let go and the eel fell back into the canal. The fisherman said: ‘You are an idiot, no wonder we are poor’. The woman said nothing, but thought of her little finger and cried. Moments later, the skipper got another bite and caught a huge tench. He threw it on the deck and said to his wife: ‘Take it and cook it.’ The wife tried to grab the tench, but it hit her on the thumb with its tail and jumped back into the canal. The man shouted: ‘I told you were an idiot, no wonder we are starving.’ The woman said nothing; she sat on the deck with her feet in the gangway and sucked her thumb. Soon after, the fisherman caught a big golden fish. He said to his wife, 'Take it and fry it.’ The wife grabbed the fish very carefully, but she liked it so much that she dared not clench her fingers tightly. So the fish broke free, jumped out and plunged into the water. The skipper threw his fishing rod on the deck in a rage and cried out: ’You are an idiot and you will always be an idiot.’ He went to bed and fell asleep. The woman was still crying with her feet in the gangway and her finger in her mouth. But soon she grabbed the rod herself and started fishing. It was not long before she had the same big, golden fish on the hook. She said to the fish: ‘You're an idiot too, just like me,’ and wanted to throw the fish back into the canal. But the fish spook: ‘Take a knife and scratch me.’ The woman started to cry even louder and said, sobbing loudly: ‘No, I can't.’ But the fish said again, this time more insistently: ‘Take a knife and scratch me’. So she took a knife and scraped the scales off. When she had scraped them off completely, she felt sorry for the fish again and threw it back into the canal. But as soon as the fish hit the water, it regained all its golden scales. And the scales the woman had scraped off turned into golden coins on the deck. Since then they have never been poor, and the man has never again called his wife an idiot.
